


Finding What Once Was Mine

by pandorasxbox



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Additional Tags May Be Added, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Denial, Durincest, Forgiveness, Jealousy, M/M, Regret, Smut, thorin is not related
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-08
Updated: 2015-02-18
Packaged: 2018-03-10 22:40:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3306023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandorasxbox/pseuds/pandorasxbox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili had been in love with his brother for years, but when he realizes those feeling are not mutual, he disappears in the night. When Fili finds his brother is missing, he is determined to find Kili and bring him back home where he belongs before something bad could happen to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Love You More

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own these Tolkien/Jackson characters.
> 
> I hate summaries...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Establishing Kili and Fili's relationship and setting the scene for what's to come.

“Fili, it’s the best work you’ve ever done! I love it, thank you so much!” Kili was amazed at how talented an artist his older brother was. For Christmas Fili had given him a small sculpture he crafted of himself holding Kili as if he were the very protective brother he really was in life.

“I’m glad you like it Kee.” Fili looked down shyly hiding behind his long blond curls for he was a particularly modest artist who didn’t think much of his own talent.

The sixteen-year-old hugged his brother whom he looked up to with much love. “Seriously, Fee, I love it! You don’t know what it means to me. I’ll keep it with me forever…”

Sitting on the floor in front of their Christmas tree, Fili wrapped an arm around his little brother giving him a chaste kiss to the head as they both became a little teary remembering what a horrible year they had endured with the loss of their parents. Their uncle agreed to give custody of Kili to his twenty-one year old brother allowing them to continue living in their home as not to disrupt the young one's life. He had been an emotional train wreck since their passing, and needed as much normality as possible at this time. 

That cold Christmas night, Fili had snuggled into his warm bed just about to drift off to sleep when he felt his blankets moving. "Kili…what are you doing?”

“I want to sleep with you, Fee, can I?” The raven haired younger brother had already made his way under the blankets.

It wasn't the first time his brother slept with him, and had become more frequent over the past few months. “Sure. You’re already here anyway. Good night, Kee. I love you.”

Kili wrapped his arm around his brother pressing himself against Fili's back giving him little squeeze. “Thanks, Fee…I love you more…”

 

**Two years later…**

“What does this mean?” Fili looked up in awe at his brother, but with uncertainty after reading the letter in his hand. 

“They said because I’m a math genius and with my knowledge of programming already, if I go to college I’m pretty much guaranteed a job with Homeland Security.” 

The blond shook his head in disbelief. “I had no idea you were this brilliant, Kee.”

“Neither did I. I took it for granted I guess.” Kili brushed some long hair from his face leaning back on the kitchen counter examining his fingernails.

Fili laid the paper on the kitchen table and took a seat. “Is this what you want to do?”

“No." The teen continued to looked at his fingers avoiding eye contact. "I don’t want that pressure. Just because I _can_ do it, doesn’t mean I _want_ to do it.”

“What do you want to do then?”

Kili hung his head feeling ashamed about his ambitions with the amount of potential he apparently had, but he wanted to follow his heart and do what a lot of young boys dreamed of doing as a career. 

“I want to be a game designer. I’ve already been offered a job with Erebor Games. They even said they’d pay for my college if I accept their offer, but…”

“But what?”

“I don’t want to move away from you.” Dark eyes peeked over his brow for a moment.

The corner of Fili’s lip began to turn upward before he couldn’t help but smile at his young brother. 

“Do what you want to do, Kee. It’s your life, and whatever career you decide on is completely up to you. You need to do what will make you happy because you're going to be doing it a looong time.” 

“I wouldn’t be happy if I wasn’t with you.” The quiet genius still wasn't smiling as he replied honestly.

“Kili, you're set to have a career. I'm a painter and a bar owner. I can own a bar and find work as a painter anywhere in the country.” Fili would do anything for his brother.

“You mean, you’d go with me?” With a spark of hope, Kili perked up. 

“Of course! I’d go anywhere to be with you, Kee. I know how much this means to you! You’re amazing with computers, and I don’t want to be the reason you don’t follow through with your dreams.” Fili laughed standing up from his chair to grab a beer from the fridge. “Besides, I know what you can do with a computer because I remember a certain someone getting into trouble a few years ago for hacking into the school’s website.”

“I just wanted to fix my grade because that asshole Mr. Sims didn’t give me what I deserved on that project!” He huffed standing a bit taller. 

“And didn’t you get banned from playing one of those video games of yours for hacking it too?" The blond raised an eyebrow.

“I was only trying to fix what was wrong with the game because they wouldn’t…” Mumbling, Kili slumped back against the counter again.

"You better be careful what you use your talents for...”

**Three years later….**

“Are you two sure you can make it inside alright?” Bard asked as he parked his car in the driveway of Fili and Kili's house.

With a wave of a hand to their friend, the brothers leaned on one another laughing, falling and stumbling their way into the house. Once inside and the door slammed closed, Fili tripped over ottoman falling onto the oversized chair pulling Kili down onto him. The dead weight of his raven haired brother sprawled over him made it difficult to breathe.

“Kee, get off of me!” Fili continued to laugh trying to heave Kili off of him. "Why are you so heavy!"

Kili hummed nuzzling into his brother's neck before slowly raising his head enough to look into those blue pools with a wicked tempting smile. "I want you Fili." 

The blond snickered believing his brother was playing, but soon realized he was not. Warm breath grazed Fili’s lips. Just as he was about to ask his brother what he was doing, he no longer needed to ask. Kili pressed his lips against his soft lips feeling the scratch of his mustache and beard through his own stubble face. 

Fili didn’t know what to say looking up into his brother's big doe eyes with his long raven hair draped about his face, but his body reacted unlike he ever thought it would. He was suddenly very aroused, and for the life of him he didn’t know why he couldn't control himself wanting his brother this way. It was obvious Kili was going to get his way running his fingers into his brother’s long curls kissing him again. Fili couldn't stop himself from parting his lips as his brother deepened their kiss, while he slid his hands under Kili's shirt to rake his fingers across his muscular back.

“Fili…” Kili breathed heavily as lust over took him. Fili couldn’t deny how badly he wanted Kili too, but even so drunk he knew this was wrong as he made an feeble attempt to stop this illicit act. “We can’t do this Kili. We’re brothers!”

“I don’t care if we’re brothers! I can’t stand it Fili…I’ve wanted you for so long…I never had the nerve to tell you until now…I know you want me too because I’ve heard you whispering my name over and over while you’re palming yourself late at night when you thought I was asleep. Please Fili…I love you so much… do this for me…do it for us...”

There were many nights Fili would lie in bed at night closing his eyes dreaming of making love to his brother, but that was only a fantasy. He knew he would never act upon those urges, it was wrong. But here, right now being so drunk with Kili grinding on him and his own arousal wanting his brother just as much as he wanted him, Kili was simply irresistible. 

“No one would ever need to know! It’s between us…fuck me Fili …I love you so much Fee...pleeeasssse…” In the heat of the moment, Fili was losing the battle to resist Kili's dark eyes as they enchanted him, begging him to take him.

Kili pushed himself up reaching for his brother's hand guiding him drunkenly to his bed. Once in the room, he removed his clothing as quickly as possible before lying on the bed.

As Fili slowly undressed himself, Kili laid on the bed preparing himself writhing with carnal desire for his brother. He almost couldn’t restrain himself from cumming before Fili could even touch him just watching him remove his clothing was arousing enough. Seeing the material slide across Fili's tone muscles, Kili wet his lips. "Fili...hurry...I-I want touch you, I want to feel you inside me..." With as much patience he could muster he stroked his own length watching his brother kneeling between his legs roll on the condom and coat himself with the lube. "I'm ready for you Fee..." The young one bent his legs up reaching for his blonde lovers hips.

When Fili gently touched the head of his cock to Kili’s entrance, the heat was like fire as he slowly sank into him. He wanted more, no matter how deep he plunged into his brother’s willing hole, he wanted more until he was buried balls deep into him. This was the moment they both had been fantasizing over for so long. Thrusting repeatedly over and over, deeper and faster until they were both breathless and tense, moaning as Kili rolled his hips to feel his brother climax inside of him continuing to thrust a few more times until he was completely spent wanting to collapse onto him. 

Removing the condom tossing it to the floor, Fili grasped Kili's aching erection in his callused palm sliding his hand up and down in perfect rhythm. Kili moaned and gasped as Fili stroked the velvety skin of his rock hard length slick with pre-cum until he found his release shuddering as the white hot seed began spilling and spurting over the blond's hand coating his own stomach. 

Fili stared into those dark loving eyes looking up at him. Leaning down to kiss his brother, he whispered "I love you, Kili." only to hear Kili whisper his reply "I love you more..."

 

In the morning light, Fili woke unable to move with Kili’s arm and a leg draped over him pinning him in place on the bed. When the realization of what they had done the night before came flooding back, he sighed and cursed himself for giving into what he knew was so wrong. With any luck, he hoped Kili had been way more intoxicated than he was and wouldn’t remembering anything about what they had done. 

Sliding out of bed without waking Kili, he went to the kitchen to make some coffee after drinking a whole glass of water. Fili looked at the glass and filled it again. Hangovers suck. Just as he was taking his first drink, he spit the water back into the sink when he felt hands slide around his hips.

Swiftly turning around, he saw Kili standing there smiling impishly. “Good morning, Fee!”

“You scared the shit outta me Kee! I thought you were sound asleep! Why were you sneaking up on me like that?” Fili tried to calm the pounding in his chest taking another drink of water before sitting the glass on the counter as his brother just shrugged his shoulders for an answer. 

“What are we doing today?” Kili said with much enthusiasm. 

“I’m going to work.” The blond said turning to fill his travel mug with coffee.

“Oh. It’s Saturday, I thought maybe we could do something this afternoon before we go to the bar tonight.” The young one sounded disappointed.

“I have a painting job I need finish. I won’t be long, but yeah, we’re still going to the bar tonight. I don’t plan on getting as drunk though.” He smiled and reached out to pat him on the arm as he began to walk away, but Kili blocked his path stopping him. “What are you doing?”

Leaning forward, he kissed him gently before pulling back a bit. Fili stood there in confusion. “Kee? Why did you do that?” The kiss heightened his concern wondering what his brother really thought about last night.

“I…I just wanted to say have a good day and see you tonight…I love you.” He hesitantly replied before heading back to his bedroom. 

Hearing the bedroom door shut, Fili closed his eyes and shivered with regret. _'We shouldn't have had sex last night...Kili loves me 'too' much.'_


	2. Your Place Or Mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili tries to explain to Kili what they did was a mistake, but Kili doesn't understand and becomes very upset when he finds out Fili left the bar with someone else.

As soon as Fili came home from work and kicked off his boots, Kili followed him around like a puppy dog talking a mile a minute about anything and everything. Trying not to be rude, his patient brother let him ramble on as he was preparing to take a shower.

“…And they said they really liked my ideas!” Kili was beaming with pride over his latest accomplishments at work. He loved his job as a game designer, and was quickly impressing his superiors.

Fili threw his towel over the towel rack inside the shower and turned to acknowledge his brother’s excitement and commend him while he unhooked the straps of his paint splattered overalls. “That’s great Kee! I had no doubt you’d be a great designer, and I’m happy you’re excited about your job!” 

Kili finally stopped talking when he watched the bib of the overalls fall around Fili’s waist and the black t-shirt being removed revealing his hard tattooed chest. His eyes followed the muscular V dipping into his pants that had dropped much lower on his hips now. “Kee…Kili?” He shook his head hearing his name.

“I’m going to take my shower now.” It was a polite hint to leave the small bathroom, but Kili didn’t want to leave.

Taking a bold chance he had to ask. “Can I take a shower with you? I could help you wash the paint out of your hair?”

Inside the blond cringed biting his lip trying to think of the right thing to say here. This was becoming very awkward and uncomfortable. “I, uh, I’m good. I never have a problem getting the paint out of my hair, but thanks. I’ll be done in no time, okay?” Luckily Kili took the nod to leave so Fili could shut and lock the door to take his shower in peace and alone.

As soon as he heard the water running, Kili gently tried to turn the door knob, but sighed finding it was locked. The thought ran through his mind, maybe he should surprise his brother waiting for him in his room. Then better judgment prevailed, and he went into his own bedroom to finish getting ready to go to the bar. 

Letting the warm water run over his body after he had finished washing, Fili just stood there thinking. Thinking about how he was going to handle his fragile brother’s feelings. He couldn’t go on letting him think they were now more than brothers, but this had to stop. Neither one had yet to speak of last night, nor did Fili want to talk about it, but it had become quite clear he needed to address the situation with his brother to set things straight.

After drying off, the blond wrapped the towel around his waist and hurried to his room to grab some clothes before Kili could make his move again, but he wasn’t quick enough. Feeling his brother’s presents standing in the doorway, he was only comforted by the fact he at least was able to get his briefs on before he arrived.

“Kili…I don’t mean to be rude, but do you mind? I’d like to get dressed alone please.” With his back turned toward his little stalker, the blond surely didn’t know Kili had already moved right behind him. 

Startled Fili jumped when his brother placed his hands on his broad shoulders running his hands down his back. He turned quickly and wrapped his hands around Kili’s upper arms to make some distance between them. “Kee…Look…we need to talk about this.”

Tipping his head, Kili furrowed his brow. _‘What was there to talk about?’_

“About last night. We were really drunk, and _that_ should have never happened. Do you understand?” He could already tell he wasn't getting through to him.

No, the younger one didn’t understand at all, and didn’t want to. “But I love you, and I thought you loved me…”

The blond shook his curls adamantly making sure Kili was reading his sincere blue eyes. “I do love you, but we're brothers and we are _never_ going to do that again.”

Kili heard him, but still didn’t comprehend completely. In his mind, they had bonded and Fili was his. He gave a nod walking backwards before heading out to the living room. He turned on the television and grabbed a game controller to kill some time before they were to leave for the bar.

Fili knew this wasn’t going to be the end of this matter. His genius brother sometimes had a hard time dealing with common sense. In general, he had a hard time controlling his emotions and feelings as well. Fili continued to get dressed, and grabbed his car keys from the dresser. 

“Are you ready?” When Kili wouldn’t respond, he stood between Kili and the television blocking his game like he used to do when his brother was a teenager and wouldn’t listen to him.

Kili threw the game controller on the coffee table, and went out the front door. Fili took a deep breath and exhaled as he turned off the television, and followed his brother out the door saying to himself, _‘This is going to be a long night.’_

 

“Hey Bard!” Fili acknowledged his number one bartender and friend already taking care of customers as he followed Kili into the bar. 

Bard said hello to them both keeping an eye on broody Kili going off to sit alone on a stool at the end of the bar while discreetly asking his boss what was going on as Fili joined him behind the bar. “Trouble in paradise?” Fili nodded and replied, “Yes, and please don’t say it that way.”

Bard raised an eyebrow only to have this conversation end as quickly as it began when the blond flatly said, “Don’t ask.” 

The bar owner washed a few glasses, before walking over to meet with the band setting up to play that night. A semi-regular female customer asked Bard for a drink and took a seat next to Kili. The brunet looked behind him to see where Fili was before returning to his beer. 

“Hey. You’re Fili’s brother aren’t you?” The dark haired woman smiled a bit shyly at her bar partner.

Kili just nodded taking another drink from his bottle. “Yeah. Are you friend of his?”

She looked behind them to watch the sexy bar owner chatting with someone from the band. “No, but I’d like to be. I only know he owns this place from coming in here every now and then.” Turning back, she had already made up her mind Kili was going to be her drinking buddy for the evening. “Can I buy you a drink?”

The brunet accepted her offer taking the fresh bottle from Bard. With his mood on the upswing now, he smiled and thanked the woman for the drink.

After they made small talk for a bit, the woman had to ask her burning question. “Does your brother have a girlfriend?” 

The slight smile as well as his mood dissipated quickly. “No.” He looked around for his brother again. “He’s too busy to have a relationship with anyone.”

Eventually Fili shook hands with the band’s guitarist when they were ready to play, and walked over to see who this lovely lady was mingling with his brother. There was as glimmer a hope Kili would move on after all. Unfortunately, stopping by the meet her proved to be the wrong move.

After introducing himself, the woman turned her bar stool to greet him. Wearing a short dress and sexy heels, her bare shapely crossed leg came to rest against the bar owner’s thigh. She sensually bit her lower thick pouty lip looking into his beautiful blue eyes with her own dark round eyes. 

No words were even spoken as Kili slammed his bottle onto the bar, and abruptly left his seat heading for the restroom. Fili could hear the bathroom stall door slam from where they were. “I’m sorry.” She apologized realizing she may have been the reason for discord between them at the moment.

Fili shook his head. “It’s alright. He was in a mood before he got here tonight. Can’t a get you a drink? It’s on the house…” His gorgeous smile made her heart race. 

Kili hid in one of the two bathroom stalls in the small bar restroom, and slammed his fist into the door. _‘Why are you so stupid Kili?’_ He punished himself for not trying to put the moves on that girl before Fili got to her just to keep her away from his brother. _‘That’s it…I’ll tell Fili I’m into her so he’ll go away…”_

Fili handed the woman her drink. “Thank you…I know you’re working, but…” She uncrossed her legs spreading them as she put a hand on the bar owner’s hip coaxing him toward her. “Do you think maybe we could…” 

_‘Damn she’s hot!’_ Fili was enraptured with this voluptuous little vixen staring at her pink lips.

“Hey, uh…would you want to come back to my office for a minute?” Fili had become very horny and he wanted this woman, and he wanted her now. With a nod she took his hand allowing him to lead her to the back room. "Is it okay if we go to your place? I just need to grab a few things first..."

By the time Kili returned from the restroom he found his drinking partner was gone. He scanned the room looking for Fili, and couldn’t find either one of them. Putting two and two together, he yelled to Bard over the loud music as the band played on. “Bard! Where’s Fili?”

Hearing Kili’s voice Bard looked around until he spotted him standing behind others seated at the bar looking rather disorientated. He answered loudly over the music. “He left. He asked me to take you home tonight. Go sit down and let me get you beer.” 

Kili began to breathe heavily as if he were having an anxiety attack, and went back to his end bar stool. Bard brought him a beer, and touched his hand resting on the bar. “Kee? Are you alright?” He waved Bard away and drank his beer.

The disturbed brother was beside himself. _‘Fili loves me! Why would he leave with that woman? I knew I should have kept her away from him!’_ Reliving their intimate moment from last night over and over hearing Fili tell him he loved him was driving him mad.

A couple hours had past, and Fili still hadn’t returned. Now and then other customers would stop to sit with Kili, but he was in no mood for company. That was until a very tall handsome man with very long dark wavy hair, full beard and piercing blue eyes took a seat next to him.

“Is this seat taken? Mind if I join you?” This man’s voice was mesmerizing. Kili moved some of the bottles on the bar and motioned for Bard. “No, please sit! Let me buy you a drink. What would you like?”

The man shook his head. “I’ve got this.” When Bard got to the end of the bar, the man order a beer for Kili, and drink for himself. Bard got the drinks and returned sitting them on the bar in front of them giving Kili a questionable look out of the corner of his eye as if to let him know he was watching him. 

“My name’s Thorin.” Kili returned his name to him. “Are you here alone?” This gorgeous man looked around taking a drink from his glass.

“Yeah, I’m alone…allll alone…” He said looking so forlorn running his fingers over the moisture on his bottle.

Thorin could tell Kili had been drinking for quite a few hours by the looks of him. “Hard to believe a young man as good looking as you are is here alone. I’m surprised you don’t have women hanging all over you!”

Kili could only think of one woman at the moment, and she was somewhere hanging all over his brother this very second. “Nope. No women, no girlfriends, no men, no boyfriends…no brothers…all alone.”

Thorin moved a few strands of the young man’s long fine raven hair away from his face before placing his hand on Kili’s thigh. “Do you like men?” Kili nodded drinking in this older man’s affections. “Would you like to come home with me? We could go to your place if you'd rather?” 

Very hesitantly, Kili swallowed thickly and answered, “Your place.” Thorin motioned for Bard and handed him a couple fifties, telling him to keep the change. After the bartender walked away, he wrapped an arm around Kili heading him toward the door of the small bar. 

Bard caught a glimpse of Kili leaving with the tall handsome man. “Kili! Wait! Fili told me to take you home!”

Kili snuggled into Thorin’s side giving Bard a cocky smirk. “No thanks, Bard. I’ll find my own way home.”


	3. Without A Trace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili finds out Kili has disappeared, and is very worried about him.

Before the sun had a chance to rise, Fili woke up in a strange bed. He began looking about the room in the darkness waiting for consciousness to help him remember. Rolling over to one side he could see the body he went home with lying next to him. Seeing the woman with the shoulder length brunette hair and big round dark eyes, a strange thought occurred to him. So many of the women he slept with all looked like her. They all looked a lot like Kili.

Turning to his feet to the floor, Fili reluctantly pushed himself out of bed, and shuffled into the bathroom to relieve himself. The blond sighed when he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror looking like trash. He rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his unruly mane before throwing on his clothes to quietly leave for home.

The hum of the car was lulling him back to sleep. It certainly wasn’t time to be awake yet. As he pulled into the driveway and walked to the front door, something didn’t feel right. As Fili entered the house, he maneuvered through the darkness to his room. Just as he was about to undress, something pulled him back into the hallway. 

Kili’s bedroom door was open. He quietly went inside to check on him, and found an empty bed. Fili never thought to check his phone when he woke up assuming everything was fine, so immediately he grabbed the phone to search for any messages from Kili or Bard as he ran around the small house looking for any sign of him.

Bard had tried to text him at least ten times, all making sure Fili knew he did not take Kili home, that he had left with a strange man he’d never seen before. The panic stricken brother tried calling Kili’s cell phone, and when he didn’t answer, he began texting him repeatedly every two minutes.

Without any returned calls or texts, Fili walked back into Kili’s room and flipped on the light. A gasp escaped him and a chill ran down his spine as he knelt to the floor picking up the broken sculpture he had made for his brother so many years ago. The two bodies of the sculpture were literally broken apart. 

Kili loved that sculpture more than anything he owned. Fili sat on the floor looking around the room that was in disarray. The closet door and drawers were open, and most of his clothes were missing, but his laptop and the phone he had just tried to call and text were sitting right there on his desk turned off. He picked up the phone and checked for any sign of discussing his plans or who he was with to no avail.

Fili ran to the living room, and looked out the window to find Kili’s car was still in the driveway. “Oh Kili…where are you? Where did you go?” His heart ached with worry knowing his brother was out there somewhere with a strange man without anyway of being able to contact him. It wasn’t like he was a child, but Kili could be very gullible and naïve. 

Being so late or rather so early however you look at it, Fili called Bard. Of course when Bard saw who was calling, he was just as anxious to talk to him. “Fili, I’m so sorry Kili got away. I tried to stop him, but…”

The anxious blond cut him off. He knew none of this was his friend’s fault, and shouldn’t have left him in charge of watching his brother. “You don’t know the guy he left with? Are you sure you’ve never seen him before?”

“No. He was an older man. Very nice looking, dressed well, and apparently has money because he gave me a hundred dollars for a thirty-six dollar tab.” Bard gave him a full description of the man, and didn’t seem as concerned as he was earlier.

Fili was still very concerned, and maybe more so because the man had money. It didn’t matter to him how nice looking the guy was, he had his brother and was possibly going to do gods knows what to him. The bartender promised if he saw either of them, he would let him know right away. Leaving messages and talking to all of Kili's friends left him empty handed as well, though they too all assured him they would keep an eye out for him.

When the alarm went off Monday morning waking Fili from a horrible dream, he was relieved it was only a bad dream. Lying in bed trying to fully awaken, his phone rang. Suddenly he was very wide awake with hopes it was Kili, but it was a call that made Kili’s disappearance even worse. Kili didn’t show up for work. His dream job, the job just days ago he was rambling on about how much he loved working there and what he was doing. This was bad. Very bad. 


	4. Guest or Prisoner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened to Kili the night he left with Thorin.

Beautiful and ominous, Thorin's home was a fortress secluded within high stone walls and security monitored locked gates. Thorin was a very wealthy man, and it became apparent to Kili right away, whatever Thorin wants, Thorin gets. What he desired most at the moment was the alluring young man he brought home from the small bar in town.

By the time they had arrived here, Kili had time to sober some. Being all alone in this massive home far from the safety of his own home with Fili, he became very apprehensive about his decision to leave with this man. As Thorin moved in closer to him, his dark eyes darted about taking a step back as the older man invaded his personal space.

“I’m not going to hurt you, Kili.” Thorin gave the nervous young man an assuring smile. “I want you to feel at home here.” Moving slowly not to frighten him, he wrapped his arms around him bringing the trembling brunet closer to himself. 

Kili stood there blinking those doe eyes looking timid and somewhat helpless. That look of innocence sent fire through Thorin’s veins. He placed a firm hand alongside the brunet’s face forcing him to look up into his sapphire eyes. “How many have you slept with?” 

Swallowing the best he could to quench his dry throat, Kili answered. “F-Four women a-and two men…no, three…” he remembered to add Fili to that list. “Hmmm…” Thorin swayed gently with Kili in his embrace. “Perfect…are you ready to make that _four_ men?” 

After sharing a few more drinks with Kili to relax him, he began to kiss and touch him intimately. It didn’t take long to seduce the naïve young one into his bed. Kili was submissive letting him touch him anyway he pleased, and would do anything he asked of him. Blindfolding his eyes and binding his wrists, Thorin delighted in watching his beautiful raven haired lover impaling himself on his throbbing cock. This was the best fuck he ever had, and wasn’t about to let this one get away. 

Holding his young lover close to himself tucked beneath his chin, he pressed a kiss into Kili’s silky hair. “I adore you, Kili. You are so precious. I want you to stay here with me.” Kili looked up seeing the sincerity in Thorin’s words written on his face. “Live with me, and I’ll take care of you. You’ll never have to work or worry about anything ever again. Just be mine.” 

Kili told Thorin a little about his situation with Fili. That was all the deceptive man needed to know, and after a few words of persuasion promising love and affection, Kili was ready to go home to get a few of his things and leave his old life behind. He was still angry Fili left with that woman, and he didn't love him the way he thought he did. Obviously he was not thinking clearly through the haze of alcohol and lust for this older man. 

~*~

The charming, wealthy man made Kili feel special, wanted and needed. “You are my most cherished treasure, my little raven.” Thorin showered him with lavish gifts, and treated him like royalty. All he asked in return was for his ravishing new lover to be in his bed, and ready for him when he wanted him.

 _‘Little Raven’_ The endearing name struck a chord within Kili. _'Fili used to call me that when I was young.'_

Thorin would grow cold at the mention of his lover’s brother’s name, and put an end to any further mentioning of his past life. “No need to bring up the past, Kili.” 

Kili enjoyed the comforts of this home and how lovingly devoted Thorin was to him, but as the days passed by, he began to feel remorse for leaving Fili without letting him know he was leaving, or where he was going. His brother had to be worried sick about him. 

Knowing he left his cell phone behind at home, he had no way of contacting Fili or anyone for that matter. With all of Thorin's computers and laptops locked away, he was truly cutoff from the rest of the world. It had become clear he was not a guest in Thorin’s home, but a prisoner within these fortress walls.


	5. Mine and Yours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili confesses he loves Kili more than a brother.

Another day with no word or sign of Kili. Hope faded with each passing day, but Fili refused to listen to anyone suggesting foul play. He swore he could feel his brother. An unseen bond they shared, he just knew Kili was alive out there somewhere.

Fili’s open bedroom window let the warm summer night air caress his exposed skin as he lay flat on his back on his bed. Closing his eyes listening to the wind chimes quietly resonating in the breeze trying to clear his mind of any thoughts as he started to drift to sleep. 

At first he was startled to feel the light sheet slowly being slid from his lower body believing the silky sheets had fallen on their own. But then fingers lace with his own being held down near his head and the weight of someone hovering over him caused him to open his eyes to see a curtain of dark hair and big round dark eyes looking down at him. 

“Kili?” He said hoarsely just as Kili leaned down to kiss him with the most sensual kiss he’d ever had in his life smoothing his moist tongue across Fili’s lips slowly before letting it delve deep claiming his mouth as he let his hardened length rock against Fili’s clothed arousal keeping his hands pinned to the bed. 

With tears in his eyes, Fili looked up at his brother he had desperately missed for weeks. “I missed you so much! I know now I do love you more than a brother, Kee. You are mine and I am yours forever. I love you, Kili…”

Kili whispered, “I love you more...” Grinding against his beautiful blond brother, Fili shut his eyes throwing his head back rolling his hips up to feel Kili’s erection pressing against his own. "Take me, Kili...I want you..." Breathing heavily he continued to thrust his hips upward, feeling as if he would come in his briefs hearing his brother’s voice in a tone so demanding. “Fili…look at me…look at me! Open your eyes!” 

“Kili!” Fili shouted out for his brother as his eyes flew open, sitting straight up in bed as a bolt of lightning crashed, and the rumbled of thunder shook the house. The rain had begun to come through the screened window. The frightened and disoriented blond grabbed his chest as his heart raced. He was panting and shaking looking around the room for his Kili, but as he closed the window, reality came flooding back. Wrapped in the darkness of night, Fili pulled a light blanket up to comfort him. His sweet, loving brother was here with him only in his dreams. "Please come home, Kee. I love you and need you with me..."

~*~

“Please Thorin, I just want to let my brother know I’m alright, I know he’s worried about me! Why won’t you let me speak with him? Why are you treating me like a prisoner?” Kili had become very fearful for his own safety and well-being not being allowed to leave or speak to anyone. He had basically been kidnapped, and was being held captive.

As long as he did what Thorin asked, he was treated like he was a loving partner, but if he questioned his intent, the controlling man would become dark and frightening. Though he had never hurt him, he intimidated him tremendously. 

“Your brother wasn’t worried about you the night he left you alone in the bar, now was he? What’s the matter, Kili? Am I not enough for you now? Have I not treated you well?”

Kili did what he always did. Becoming submissive, he hung his head and gave Thorin a hug. The older man wrapped one arm around his waist while his other hand lifted his boy’s chin to look at him. “You belong to me now.” 

That night Thorin waited for Kili to fall asleep before he found his way through the mansion to the fingerprint locked room where he kept his laptop. Kili was not asleep, and followed him to see where he was going and what he was up to. Knowing this secret room was where he kept his computer and seemed to be where all the security monitors were manned was enough information to kick his genius mind into high gear. 

Hearing Thorin coming back out of the room, Kili hurried back to bed. As the older man got into bed, he pulled his young lover against his muscular chest. Kili lay in Thorin's arms smiling to himself. _‘Tomorrow I’ll be free.’_


	6. Somewhere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili can't stop seeing Kili everywhere he goes, and Kili makes an attempt to escape.

Fili’s uncle Frerin had become very concerned about his nephew’s mental state. Since Kili’s disappearance, he had become withdrawn, unsociable and a little unstable. He refused to go to his bar leaving Bard in charge, only going to his painting jobs because there he could stay busy to pass the time, and be alone with his thoughts. 

Frerin texted Fili while he was working to ask him to buy some beer for them on his way home. The blond responded to the text, and slid his phone back into the pocket of his overalls. Standing back he looked at the pale blue walls of the bare room he just finished painting to inspect his work. With a nod of approval, the painter began to clean up his supplies.

“Hey, looks great as always!” The home owner said stepping into his freshly painted empty bedroom. 

“I’m glad you like it.” Fili finished gathering up his things. “I’m going to take this stuff out to the truck and I’ll be right back to settle up.” 

After putting away all of his things in his truck, the painter went back inside to receive payment for his work. Standing in the kitchen, he handed his client a paper to sign, and began to write out a receipt for the check he was about to receive. He had worked for this man before. They had a history together. He was one of Fili’s ex-lovers.

“Here you go…” As Fili tried to take the check from him, the dark haired man held on to it taking a step closer to his painter with a little smirk. “…do you think I could maybe give you a little extra for your services while you’re here?” 

Fili had a thing for ex. Returning the cocky smirk he asked, “What’d you have in mind?” The blond pulled the check from the brunet’s grasp shoving the check into his pocket. He teetered on flirting or being a prick. “Do you wanna fuck?” 

It was an instant reaction, the man with the long dark hair and dark hazel eyes pinned his painter against the wall kissing him wantonly. Fili’s eyes shut and his head rolled to the side as the man trailed kisses, nipping and sucking at his neck. “I’ve missed you Fili…” he whispered across his skin.

 _‘I’ve missed you Fili’_ Echoed in his head, but in another familiar voice. The smell of his skin, the taste of his kiss was intoxicating, but he was forced back to reality when he opened his eyes. “I-I can’t do this…I’m sorry, I just can’t.” Fili pushed him away and started to leave only to have the brunet grab his arm pulling him back. “Why not? We were amazing in bed Fili! Don’t you remember?” 

The blond looked at his ex, and all he could see was his brother staring back at him until he shook his head to refocus. “I remember. It’s was great, but I’m sorry. I’m in love with someone.” As much as he wanted to give into his carnal desires, thinking of Kili wouldn’t allow him to give himself to anyone else now. 

Without looking back, Fili went out the door, got into his truck and drove away. Trying to force his ex-lover out of his mind, and think of anything besides how badly he wanted to get laid again, he turned on the radio for distraction. As he did every day driving, he kept an eye out for Kili hoping eventually he would see him somewhere.

Suddenly slamming on the brakes, the car behind him almost rear ended his truck. “Kili?” He watched a young man walking down the sidewalk for a moment realizing it was indeed not his missing brother. The car behind him blew their horn just as he slowly began to drive on.

“I’m losing it, Frerin. Everywhere I go, I think I see Kili in everyone I see that looks even remotely like him. I thought I saw him walking down the street, and when I stopped at the quik-mart to buy the beer I embarrassed myself thinking I saw him in line there.”

Telling his uncle about his day and what was happening to him, Frerin shook his head. This was happening daily now. “Fili…it’s been over a month…” 

Fili shoved Frerin in anger shouting at him. “No! I can feel him! Kili’s out there somewhere and I have to find him! I’ll never stop looking for him!” 

"Fili! All I was going to say was, Kili will come back when he's ready!" Frerin's nephew broke down falling into his arms. "I believe you. I believe he _is_ out there somewhere. We just have to stay positive and hope he's safe."

~`~`~`~

With hope today would be the day he was going to be able to escape, Kili was in an especially good mood when he woke his lover surprising him by climbing on top of him. Kili loved having sex with the experienced older man. However, he didn’t want to be Thorin's sex slave he had become anymore. 

He missed his friends, he missed going to work at Erebor Games, he missed playing video games, and most of all he missed Fili. If Thorin wasn’t going to let him have a real life, he was ready to take back the life he had by escaping this secured fortress.

As soon as Thorin left unsure of how long he would be gone, Kili was ready to put his plan in motion. He made his way to the small secluded room he had followed Thorin to the night before, and broke into the security lock allowing himself entrance to the computers, security system, and his laptop. 

The computer genius immediately started work on hacking into the laptop. He was prepared to take it with him if he had to. All the while, he watched the security monitors for Thorin to return. Frantically his fingers flew across the keyboard trying everything he could to break code for the computer system as well as the security system. 

Thorin hadn’t been gone that long when Kili was startled by a deep voice questioning his actions. “What are you doing?” Thorin stood in the doorway of this small room. The genius had become so engrossed in his work, he forgot to watch the monitors.

Thorin reached down and smacked the laptop out of Kili’s hands. The enraged man grabbed the wide-eyed, shaking boy by the neck pulling him to his feet. “How dare you!” His hand tightened and his fingers began to dig into his neck. Barely able to breathe, Thorin got an evil grin hearing Kili’s strangled plea. “P-Please!...”

“I know who you are Kili…" The irate man spat. "You like hacking computers so much, you're going to work for me now!” With one very swift motion, Thorin slammed his possession into the wall before releasing him. Kili dropped to the ground choking and gasping for air. “You don’t think I would keep you here without investigating you, do you? I've found another use for you besides sex. I know what you're capable of, and you’re going to make yourself quite useful to me.”


	7. You Know Too Much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin puts Kili to work and they confess their feelings for one another. Frerin forces Fili to get out of the house and go back to his bar.

Standing over Kili, Thorin watched him carefully as he worked to break into one of the world’s largest corporation’s server. As long as his personal computer hacker had his hand on a keyboard, the devious business man would not take his eyes off of him making sure he didn’t try to contact anyone, and did only the work he asked him to do. 

Losing money in stocks was something this millionaire couldn’t tolerate, and as of late he had been devastated by a slew of declining stock prices. He was determine to turn that around using Kili’s gifted talent to learn trade secrets, and within a week he was successfully earning money again.

“My precious Kili, you have outdone yourself!” Thorin poured more sparkling champagne into Kili’s glass as the boy lay back against his chest in a hot steamy luxurious tub. “You deserve to be pampered this evening, my love.” Filling another glass for himself, the elated business man kissed Kili’s head lying just beneath his chin.

The brunet laid his head back to rest against Thorin’s broad chest after taking a drink from his glass. “I love you, Kili.” It was the first time he heard his lover say those words. It was heartfelt, and lying here so intimately in his lovers arms, his emotions were overwhelmed. Just a week ago, this man was so angry with him he literally could have killed him, and yet Kili had fallen in love with him. When it came to his emotions, he was very immature full of neediness and fed off promises of being loved. 

Kili sat his fluted champagne glass on the side of the tub, and turned around to face his gorgeous older man. “I love you too, Thorin.” He smiled and his dark eyes sparkled reflecting the many candles lighting the room.

Thorin took a very red, plump strawberry from a bowl sitting on the edge of the tub holding the berry close to Kili’s lips. His stiffening length twitched watching his young lover sensually bite ever so slowly into the berry as a trickle juice ran from his lips down his chin. “You are a vision of perfection, my little raven.”

Kili swallowed the bite he took and teasingly ran his tongue over his lips wiping away the sweet juice. “Hmmm…you want me to wrap my lips around your cock, don't you?” 

The seductive older man pulled his tantalizing lover toward him placing his hands on the his hips, allowing his beautiful, alluring raven haired man to straddle him. "Let me taste your sweet lips." Kili’s long fingers ran through the wet dark hair on Thorin’s hard chest sliding up behind his head tangling into his very long tresses as the two lovers shared a deep passionate kiss. “I want you to ride me, Kili. I want to make love to you right here.” The very warm water brought their senses alive with every touch trailing across their skin. The candle light danced in Thorin’s sapphire blue eyes. “I do love you so much. Don’t ever leave me, Kili.”

Feeling guilty about trying to escape, Kili tried to be honest with Thorin hoping honesty would be the key to winning his freedom. “Thorin…I never wanted to leave you. I love you, but…I want to be able to come and go as I please. I don’t know why you feel the need to hold me captive. I would come back at my own freewill, honest.”

Thorin’s mood began to darken at the suggestion. “That’s what they all said, and none of them came back. I need you as much as I want you, Kili. I’m afraid I can’t let you leave now anyway. You know too much…”

~*~`~*~

Frerin was beside himself. If he had to, he was going to pick Fili up, throw him into the car and take him to his bar. “Get your ass off that couch and get dressed! We’re going to the bar whether you like it or not! It’s your business! It’s the very least you can do to show up there even for an hour and give Bard a break! The poor man’s wearing himself out taking care of _your_ business!” 

“No! I don’t want to go there!” Fili sat right there in his briefs on the couch where he had been sitting all day staring at the television.

Frerin left the room for a moment returning with a pair of nice jeans and a dress shirt throwing them at the stubborn blond. “Put those clothes on and fix that mop on your head! We’re going to the bar even if I have to literally drag you there, do you understand me?”

Even Fili wasn’t sure why he refused to go his own business. He assumed it was because it was the last place he was with Kili before he disappeared, and didn’t want to relive the night of their discord. Reluctantly, he took a shower and left with his uncle to check on his business, and relieve his bartender and best friend for a while.

When the bar owner walked in the door of his business, he was greeted with multiple welcoming sentiments. Bard literally jumped over the bar to give Fili a big hug. “I’m so glad to see you here again!”

Fili sort of laughed at Bard’s overwhelming welcome, and put on a fake smile for everyone else. “Go sit down, and I’ll serve _you_ a drink.” He offered Bard a chance to relax while he took over bartending for the rest of the evening.

After locking up the bar, Bard, Frerin and Fili sat together having a few more drinks. Fili’s ears were ringing from the constant noise of the loud music, people laughing and talking all night long. The only noise now was the hum of the air conditioning, and the television turned on low volume.

“Bard, I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done taking care of the place for me. It was selfish of me to put this responsibility all on you.” Fili was sincerely grateful for his best friend stepping up to help him out when he needed it the most.

“I know you would’ve done anything for me if I needed your help, Fili. I’m just sorry I couldn’t have stopped Kili from leaving with that guy.” Bard hung his head still feeling somewhat responsible for Kili’s disappearance. 

Frerin shook his head. “Nobody’s blaming you, Bard. It wasn’t your fault. Kili’s twenty-one, he had the right to leave with anyone. He’s always been emotional, and when he gets angry it takes a long time for him to get over it. I’m sure he’ll come home when he’s over whatever set him off.”

Fili never told his uncle exactly what had happened between them. He felt completely responsible for Kili’s disappearance, and it was killing him not knowing what happened to his little brother.

Bard found himself mindlessly staring at the television, when a familiar face appeared on the screen. His eyes widen, and he jumped from his chair to find the remote behind the bar to turn up the volume.

“What’re you doing?” Fili questioned what was so important on the news his friend had to hear all of a sudden.

Bard broke into a cold sweat pointing at the television. “Oh my gods, Fili…that’s him! That’s the guy Kili left with!”


	8. Set It Free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you love something, set it free...

Kili thought of every angle hoping his lover would come to his senses and let him go, but hearing his latest comment that he knew too much told him he was _never_ going to be allowed to leave. At least he knew where and how to get into the computers, though since he had been caught breaking into the room, Thorin would tie him to the bed before he fell asleep and would lock him in a room before he left the house. 

It broke his heart realizing how mentally unstable Thorin was, because he had fallen in love with him. Within the first week of living with Thorin, he accepted the fact that he and Fili were brothers and would never be lovers. Kili needed to feel bonded with someone, and Thorin had filled that need knowing Fili didn’t love him the way he wanted him to, but gods did he miss his brother.

Kili had been Fili’s shadow all his life, and without a doubt this was the longest he had ever been away from his brother, and he missed him terribly. Just to see him or hear his voice again is all he wished for, and Thorin had made it quite clear that was not going to happen.

Thorin feared Kili’s brother would convince his young lover to leave him, and he would never come back. This would not do. He had lost too many young men letting them leave, but there were a couple that never got away. So easy for people to just disappear, he told them as a warning they did not heed to.

This one was different. Thorin loved Kili more than anyone he had before, and couldn’t bear the thought of killing this lover. No, he had a new idea on how to keep his most precious possession from feeling the need to leave. He needed to remove the source of Kili’s desire to leave.

 _‘That brother of his needs to have an unfortunate accident’_ The ruthless man lay watching his beautiful Kili sleep as he began devising his insidious plan to do away with Fili.

~*~`~*~

“Are you sure that’s him?” Fili and Frerin looked at Bard, then stared at the picture of the man on the television news story studying his features. They had never seen him before, but according to the news story, the millionaire was going to be investigated for fraud. 

“I’d bet my life on it! I swear that’s him!” Bard was never more sure of himself hoping this was the lead his friends needed to find Kili. 

That night tossing and turning neither Frerin nor Fili could sleep though it was much needed. The sun was rising which made it even harder for them to rest as adrenaline flowed through them anticipating what they were going to do next in their search for Kili. Frerin got up first to sit on the couch, only to have Fili join him minutes later. 

“I think we’re going to have to call the police in on this because we’re not going to be able to find where this guy lives. He’s a millionaire, so it’s not like his personal information is going to be readily available on the net.” Frerin sighed rubbing his face in his hands in frustration. “But we can’t prove Kili’s been abducted so they may not help us.” 

Fili pushed off the couch going to the kitchen to make coffee. The agitated blond wanted break something, preferably Thorin’s neck. “I’ll find that bastard. I want to see that motherfucker face-to-face so I can beat the fuck out of him and break every bone in his miserable body!”

“Fili, maybe Kili hasn’t been abducted. Maybe he’s staying with Thorin on his own freewill, we don’t know.” Frerin suggested just before he was blindsided by his nephew’s comment. 

“Kili wouldn't do this! He would never go this long without contacting me! Kili’s mine! He loves me and I love him!” The blond shouted furiously at his uncle standing there shaking as their blue eyes locked.

“What do you mean?” Frerin swallowed hard. Was Fili suggesting what he thought?

“It’s why he left…he was in love with me and was upset because I didn’t love him the same way.” Frerin shook his head in denial listening to what Fili was saying. “Since he’s been gone, I’ve realized how much I do love him too. I’m sorry if that is disturbing to you, Uncle, but it’s true.” 

It didn’t change anything in Frerin’s mind. Fili and Kili were his nephews, and he loved them both no matter how disconcerting this new revelation was. Maybe if Kili knew Fili was in love with him, he would come home. But first, they needed to find where Thorin lived to see if indeed that’s where his nephew was.

It was just before noon when Frerin heard someone knocking on the front door. He was in the middle of making lunch, and didn’t want to walk away from the stove. “Fili? Can you get that?” Mumbling to himself when he remembered Fili was in the shower, he removed the pan from the burner and peeked out the side window for a car in the driveway, but there wasn’t one. Frerin opened the door assuming it was a neighbor kid wanting something, but was sent into complete and utter shock when he saw who was standing there...“Kili?”


	9. Always Loved You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili and Kili have intimate time together before Kili goes home to Thorin, and Thorin is not pleased.

Frerin’s sweet smiling youngest nephew threw himself into his uncle’s arms. “Oh Kili! You’re-you’re okay! You don’t know how happy I am to see you again!”

From the bathroom, Fili could hear Frerin talking to someone. He towel dried his hair and threw on a pair of shorts. When he saw his uncle in a tight embrace with someone, he started ask, “Who…” As Frerin turned a little, Kili lifted his head from his uncle’s chest to see his brother for the first time in a couple months. “Fili!”

“Kili!” The brothers literally ran into one another’s arms almost knocking themselves over from the impact. They both cried with joy of finally being together again. Standing back, Fili firmly grasped Kili’s head in his hands looking him over. “Are you alright? Did anyone hurt you? Why haven’t you call me or anyone? I’ve been worried sick about you!”

Kili begged through his sobs for forgiveness. “Fili, I'm sorry! I’m so sorry! I’m alright…I’m great now that I’m with you again!” 

“Where have you been?” Frerin joined the two, placing a hand on Fili’s back to calm his eldest nephew.

“Fili, let Kili have a moment to relax. He can answer all our questions when he’s ready.” Their uncle smiled at Kili wrapping his arms around them both. “We’re just glad you’re home and safe now Kee.” As he was leaving the room to go to the kitchen he asked, “I’m getting something to drink, would you two want something? Some iced tea maybe?”

Kili sobered a little, and awkwardly answered as he looked into his brother’s blue eyes. “No thank you, Frerin. I’m not staying very long.”

Frerin stopped to turn around, and Fili’s jaw dropped before asking, “What do you mean, you’re not staying?”

“I need to go home. To my new partner, Thorin, and he’s expecting me back in a couple hours.” Frerin looked at his eldest nephew waiting for him to go off, but he did just the opposite. The blond hung his head, and went to his bedroom quietly shutting the door behind him.

“Kili, you got some explaining to do…” Frerin’s youngest nephew was torn about what to do now. He promised Thorin he’d be back within a couple hours at the most. He also knew how much he had hurt Fili not calling him for two months to let him know he was alright though he wanted to. 

Kili started to tell his uncle about what happened the night he left, but Frerin stopped him. “I’m not the one you need to be telling all this to. Fili has been extremely depressed and worried about you! He made himself sick over your disappearance, and you waltz in here after two months of no contact with anyone to tell him you’re leaving to go live with your new partner? You might as well have stabbed him in the heart, Kee!” Kili was acting as if he’d only been gone a day, and this was no big deal.

Frerin was obviously very happy to find Kili was safe and well, but very disappointed in how he was treating his brother. “You have no idea how Fili feels. You need to talk to him, and straighten this out before you decide to leave him again.”

 

When Kili entered Fili’s bedroom, he found him sitting on the edge of his bed looking at something he held in his hands. “Fee…I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not letting you know where I was…what’s that?” As Kili moved closer, he saw the broken sculpture Fili had made for him of the two of them embracing. He remembered the night he left how angry he was with Fili because he didn’t love him as a lover, and that he had broken the sculpture throwing it against the wall before he left with Thorin.

Seeing the sculpture in Fili’s hands where the two of them were literally broken apart, his art was imitating real life. Kili’s heart ached to see a tear fall from Fili’s eye landing on the small body he held in his hand. “I was wrong Kili.”

“What do you mean? Wrong about what?” Kili couldn’t imagine what Fili could have ever been wrong about. 

“I love you.” Fili metaphorically held the two pieces of the sculpture together, and Kili began to understand. “All the years growing up sharing a room with you, I fantasied about making love to you. I knew it was wrong to love your brother that way. I felt really bad about it with you being so much younger than I, but I always assumed it was just a fantasy until that night when we were drunk and you came on to me. I couldn’t stop myself…I didn’t want to stop myself…I didn’t stop myself from…”

“I shouldn’t have tempted you, but I had always been in love with you that way for as long as I could remember. It’s why I always wanted to sleep with you when we were older, and you didn’t understand why I was still wanting to lay next to you. I had sex with my girlfriends, even a couple boyfriends, but I never wanted anyone as much as I wanted you, Fili.” 

Fili stood up and laid the sculpture on his dresser before he turned to his brother. “I can’t deny anymore how much I love you, and want you.” He slid his hand around the small of Kili’s back pulling him against his body while the other hand went under his long raven hair to hold the back of his head in place as he pressed their warm lips together anticipating Kili to reciprocate parting his lips to allow their tongues and bodies to become intertwined. 

“I want to make love to you again, Kili.” Fili’s hands dropped down to tighten his grip on Kili’s hips as he felt his brother began to stiffen grinding against him. Kili felt as if he were melting into his brother running his hands down Fili’s muscular back working his long fingers under the elastic band of the thin cloth trying to slide Fili’s shorts down. Before he knew it, he had the blond against the wall as one of his hands had found its way into his brother’s briefs fondling his balls and semi-hard cock. 

“I want you too, Fili…I need to feel your skin against mine…” Fili began lifting his brother’s t-shirt up so the hot skin of their bare chests could touch. “I need to feel you inside me again…” The familiarity of bodies didn’t make them feel awkward in the least. It was as if they had been lovers forever, knowing how to touch one another in all the right ways. 

Now lying on the bed, the provocative look in Kili’s eyes aroused Fili’s desire to new heights. How could his brother be any more sexually attractive, and alluring than he is at this very moment lying beneath him. Kili gazed wantonly into his brother’s blue eyes watching Fili shamelessly ready to take him as if he were about to take a virgin. 

“I’ve never wanted you more than I do right now.” Fili said in a broken hoarse tone. Gods he had never wanted anyone this badly. “Touch me while I prepare you, Kee.” Sinful gasps and moans escaped them both as Kili’s hand wrapped around the blond’s aching fully hardened cock, and Fili slid his finger into his brother’s tight hole. “I can’t wait to feel your heat wrap around my cock. So much I want to do to you…” 

“I’m willing to let you do anything to me, Fee, and I’d do anything to you that you’d want from me…” Ever the submissive one, Kili loved being loved and doing what pleasured others most. 

“I don’t want anyone else but you Kee. Are you mine Kili? Are you _all_ mine?” Kili felt guilt shoot through him hearing Fili freely binding himself to him asking the same in return. Telling Thorin he loved him, now being here with his brother, the one he had always been in love with, twisted his emotions. “Of course I’m yours…I love you Fili…” His breath caught as the blond began to sink his throbbing cock into him.

How stunning Fili looked with his long golden curls hanging down with lust taking over his blue eyes. Kili propped himself up just enough to watch his brother’s cock slide in and out of his clenching hole. He threw his head back raising his hips to allow Fili to penetrate deeper into him. Fili’s muscular arms lower himself down to flick his tongue over Kili’s harden nipple before biting into the crook of his brother’s neck. 

At first Kili welcomed the initial pain of his brother’s teeth biting into his skin as he began to suck a mark into his neck, but stopped the act when he remembered Thorin. _’Oh gods what would Thorin do if he found out I was having sex with Fili?’_

Fili pulled back concerned he may have hurt his brother. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing...I want to watch you…” It was the best he could do not to break their passionate moment as he lay flat again reaching for his own hardened length twitching begging for attention. Kili and Fili locked eyes watching and waiting for one another to come undone. “Fili…don’t close your eyes…I want to watch you get off, and I want you to see what you do to me…” 

He couldn’t take it anymore. Fili’s seductive brother had pushed him over the edge. He forced Kili’s legs over his shoulders and rocked into him thrusting deeper and faster until he was cumming harder than he ever had before. His chest was heaving and his body shuddered. Fili held himself up on one strong but trembling arm to fist his brother’s shaft. 

Kili still wouldn’t take his eyes off his gorgeous blond brother completely enraptured by his love for him. Feeling the blond’s callused palm pumping his hardened length he could only think of one thing that could fulfill his fantasy now. It was the apparently something Fili wanted as well. The second the blond could feel his brother’s orgasm coming, he took his cock into his mouth and swallowed every last drop of his seed before their bodies’ slick with sweat would lie together in a sweet loving embrace. 

It felt perfect like nothing else in the world existed except for the two of them lying here in the serenity of one another’s arms. Fili placed a tender kiss to Kili’s sweaty forehead. “I don’t want to let go.” The blond sighed feeling complete and for the first time in months, at peace knowing his beloved brother was safe in his arms. 

Kili didn’t want this moment to end either, but he knew he had to leave to go back to Thorin soon. How he was going to break it to Fili was tearing him apart. “Fili, I need to tell you what’s happened, and explain to you why I…why I have to leave.” 

Fili couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “You can’t leave me, Kee, I just got you back! You said you love me! Why would you leave?” 

Kili sat up as he tried to give Fili the short story of what had happened to him over the past couple months, and Fili was even more concerned knowing his naïve brother was about to go back into the clutches of such an unscrupulous man. 

The blond shook his head in disbelief. “Why would you go back to someone who treated you like prisoner! That’s not love Kili! Why can’t you see how Thorin’s treated you is so wrong? What we have is real! What we have is true!”

“I promised him I would come back. He has been good to me…” The brunet swallowed hard seeing the pain in his brother’s eyes. He knew better than to tell Fili about the illegal work he had done for Thorin, and how he forced him to do it. "I promise you, I will come back to you as soon as I can. Knowing how much you love me changes everything, and I'll do whatever I can to get back to you, Fee. I know this is where I belong."

Fili was very angry about how ignorant his brother was being about this situation, but he had to let him go. After they took a shower together, Fili and Frerin said their good-byes, and watched Kili leave in the limo Thorin had sent for him. Sitting in the backseat of the limo, he felt something in his pocket. A little smile crossed his lips. He didn't have to look to know it was his cell phone. Fili was always thinking and watching out for him. 

Thorin was waiting for Kili as he walked through the grand doorway. “You proved me wrong, my little raven. I thought for sure you wouldn’t return. You’re a little late, but at least you came back.”

“I’m sorry I'm late. I haven’t seen my brother and uncle in a long time.” Kili bowed his head hoping Thorin would forgive him.

“Hmm…” Thorin stood closely in front of him, looking down intimidatingly at his lover as if trying to read him. “Go to my bed and wait for me.”

Thorin entered his bedroom looking almost feral crawling over top of his young lover lying there waiting for him. He tied Kili’s wrists to the headboard before running his hands and tongue all over his precious young man only stopping to pay special attention to certain erogenous spots he knew of. Though Kili had showered, Thorin could smell sex.

In his deep voice, Thorin quietly growled in his lover’s ear, “Let’s see if I can fuck you better than your brother.”

Kili’s eyes widen with fear telling Thorin everything he needed to know. “It’s true, isn’t it…you let your brother fuck you. I let you go to him, and that’s the thanks I get? Am I not good enough for you?”

"Thorin, no! I didn't have sex with my brother! Why would you think that?" Kili couldn't let him know it was Fili he slept with, afraid he would never let him leave to see him again.

"You had sex with someone! Who was it? I can smell another man on you!" Thorin was appalled, and had no intention of doing anything with Kili knowing he had been with someone else just hours ago. He was livid, and refused to untie him leaving him lying there naked and frightened.

"I have business to tend to. You're going to stay here, and think about how you've wronged me after I've been so good to you letting you go see your family today." Thorin slammed the bedroom door on leaving. Kili panicked trying to free his wrists from the ties binding him to the slats of the headboard. Twisting an pulling frantically for several minutes, he was able to loosen the material enough to finally slip one hand free from the binding to untie the material from his other wrist. 

After dressing, Kili found his phone he hid under the mattress, and called a cab asking them to wait down the road for him. He wasn't sure how long it would take to escape, but he was determined to get out of this place for good. Taking his chances, Kili ran to the secured room he now knew how to break into. Just as he was about to shut down the security system, he noticed on one of the monitors Thorin's car was gone. He had been gone for about a half hour or so. Releasing a sigh of relief, Kili was able to disable the entire security system. Without looking back the computer genius gave himself a nod of satisfaction, and ran from the house to the safety of the cab waiting down the road. He needed to get back to Fili, and he was never coming back here to Thorin. Ever.

~`~`~

Frerin had tried to talk Fili into going to the bar with him, but Fili was emotionally spent after the day he'd had. All he wanted to do was to go to bed early, and try to get a good night sleep. He was relieved knowing Kili was alright, but he worried knowing he had chosen to go back to someone he believed to be a bit psychotic. 

After some tossing and turning, the blond was just about to fall asleep when he received a text from Kili. He was overjoyed to know Kili was coming home to be with him. Now they both could sleep in peace knowing they were together in one another's arm where they felt complete.

It had only been an hour or so since the two had fallen asleep, when they awoke instantly from the loud piercing beeping from the smoke detectors going off. Bolting straight up, Fili saw the outside wall of his bedroom was on fire. "Oh no! Kili! We have to get out of here!" They both ran from his bedroom through the hallway into the living room seeing the entire house was on fire. Every room they hoped they could find a window to escape from was on fire. They were trapped.


	10. Forever Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fire and the aftermath.

Smoke had quickly begun to thicken, and the flames were burning through the walls of the frame house. Fili immediately wet a couple towels and shut the doors quickly before crawling to the living room to sit with Kili, hoping someone would break down the front door to get them out of there very soon. 

The two huddled together on the floor breathing through the wet towels to filter the smoke. “I’m so scared Fili!” Kili clung to his brother tightly as Fili kept his arms wrapped tightly around his shaking little brother. “If this is how it is to end, Kili, at least we’ll die together.”

~`~`~

When Thorin returned home and found Kili was missing, he knew his lover had escaped. The only place he knew Kili would go back to was his home. The home he used to share with Fili. The home that was now completely surrounded, fully engulfed in the fuel induced flames of the fire _he_ started. Wrought with fear for the life of the only one in this world he truly loved, Thorin sped back to the small house in town. 

Frerin was just arriving home from the bar when he saw the chaos occurring at his nephew’s home of fire trucks and other emergency vehicles surrounding the area. He parked his car down the street and ran to find someone, anyone that could tell him if Fili was alright. 

After being told being told the fire had spread so quickly, and the heat so intense they hadn’t been able to get inside yet, Frerin felt helpless knowing Fili was in there, and there wasn’t anything he could do but watch the inferno and hope they would get him out soon. Just as he began to walk away to find somewhere safe to stay out of the emergency worker’s way, he heard a commotion.

A man had been running toward the house only to be snagged by a firefighter and a police officer trying to restrain him. Though it was odd to see a stranger so adamant about feeling the need to rescue his nephew, the man looked familiar and he soon learned the truth about who this man was. If what the man was shouting about was true, both of his nephews were trapped inside. 

“Kili! Kili’s in there! I have to get him out!” The man frantically tried to pull away from the men retraining him. Frerin ran up to them staring at Thorin. He knew that face. It was the man they saw on the news Bard had said was the man Kili left with. 

“Are you sure Kili’s in there?” Frerin demanded an answer which Thorin responded without hesitation. “I’m sure of it! I need to get him out of there!” 

 

The brothers coughed and choked trying to breathe through the wet towels. They could hear people shouting outside working to put out the fire. “We’re going to be alright. I love you, Kee.” Fili assured Kili with a quick kiss on his cheek as they kept their faces close together sharing the wet towels to filter the smoke. "I love you too, Fee." Sweat had coated their bodies from the intense heat that was now beginning to feel as if they were being burned alive.

The smoke was finally more than Fili could take. Feeling lightheaded and nauseous, the blond passed out leaning heavily against this brother. Kili panicked shaking him to wake up, but quickly knew he needed to stop breathing so heavy, or he would pass out too from inhaling the toxic fumes. 

 

Thorin was much larger than the two holding him back, and upon jerking away from them he sprinted as fast as he could straight through the fire toward the front door of the house. Everyone shouted trying to stop the man from running into the fire, but on impact the door burst open due to the burned, weaken doorframe. 

Kili heard his name being called. He knew that voice, but it couldn’t be though it was. He couldn’t see through the darkness and thick black smoke, but staying very low to the floor he began to pull Fili toward the voice. Everything had become so surreal in the moments to follow. The yelling, the screaming, the roar of the flames, the deafening sound of roof and walls collapsing, then nothing but silence.

~*~*~

In the days following the tragic fire, the fire chief allowed Frerin to enter the rubble to search for any salvageable items though it didn’t appear from the burned out shell of a house there could be anything to find. Looking down kicking debris around with his boot, he saw a small white object buried beneath a charred piece of wood. 

“What’s this?” Tears welled in Frerin’s eyes as he held the small white sculpture of his nephews holding one another. In the intense heat of the fire, the two pieces of the art had melted back together, not as perfect as it once was when it originally had been carved, but nonetheless Fili was holding Kili. Fili's treasured brother he had lost had been returned, and now they would forever be together again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm leaving this up to the reader to take this however you want. Did they live or die together? Either way, they are together forever <3  
> As most of my stories, music inspires me & the song for this story was "Somewhere" by Within Temptation.


End file.
